I’m guessing you missed my experiment in live tweeting (it’s okay, everyone did!), as it took place during what was probably a lovely Saturday afternoon for most of our readers. Not to worry! I’m more than happy to bring you a condensed version of the high (and low!) lights of the evening’s entertainment. So join me on a quick jaunt through the madness that was the Eurovision 2012 Final!
The UK’s entry, Engelbert Humperdinck, performed first and came in second to last, which surprised almost nobody. The press here is determined to act like it’s shocking that a big name performer like Humperdinck was snubbed by pretty much everyone, but Eurovision is NOT about big names. It’s about skimpy costumes, cheese-y pop music, silly stage shows, and national pride/bragging rights. Singing a ballad at the start of the show means you’ll be nothing if not forgotten by the end.
Albania’s Rona Nishliu sang a song called “Suus”. She stood out to me, (her song didn’t) by pure virtue of a dress that resembled that of the evil queen in Snow White, and a huge top knot made out of either dreadlocks or rope. I was into it in a purely visual way. Austria’s entry was a band called Trackshittaz, which was a bit of an on the nose description of the song they…sang? Don’t take my word for it, though!
Winning the taking a concept way too far award was Lithuania’s Donny Montell who performed half of his song “Love Is Blind” actually wearing a bedazzled blindfold. Italy’s Nina Zilli channeled Amy Winehouse during her performance of “L’amore e femmina”, but Europe wasn’t buying it. Europe was also underwhelmed with Denmark’s Soluna Samay, who probably “Should Have Known Better” than to wear that ridiculous ship captain’s cap. The song itself was a dreamy sort of Dido-esque tune which I expected to receive more support. Jedward’s “Waterline” performed dismally for Ireland as well, even though they were dressed as sparkly emo knights and climbed into a large fountain during their stage show.
My absolute favourite of the night were the Russian grannies, Buranovskiye Babhuski with their song “Party For Everybody”. I had high hopes for the grannies, who ticked all the right boxes with their catchy song, costumes that were reminiscent of Russian nesting dolls, and their awesome stage show. They danced in unison, baked cookies at a huge fake oven, and were hoping to spend the prize money to rebuild a church that Stalin had knocked down in their village. I mean, how could anyone not vote for the Russian grannies?
The big winner of the night was Sweden’s Loreen with “Euphoria” which is already a hit in quite a few countries. By the time she got to the chorus, I realized that I’d heard the song quite a few times already on the radio. It’s a significantly more professional sounding clubby dance track that may or may not have already made it over to this US by this point, but has already charted at 85 here in the UK before Eurovision even aired.